Children at the Wedding

There is nothing so precious as children in the wedding. Your niece or daughter all dressed up, so incredibly sweet, walking down the aisle as the flower girl.

Then it happens. Halfway down the aisle she puts a pout on her face, turns red, and sits down crying. Don't be surprised, this is more common than you think.

I love seeing children in weddings. A wedding is a huge event for children. With today's delayed or second weddings the children can belong to the bride or groom and this celebration may mean a life change for the child. Letting children be involved in the ceremony is a great way to help the transition and provides many happy memories for child and adults.

But weddings are very stressful times. If it's stressful for adults, you can imagine that children feel completely out of control.

Here are a few hints for children of varying ages, from young to not quite adult and I-don't-know-where-I-fit.

Young children should be encouraged to nap before the ceremony. You're going to be excited and running around, so try and find a friend or relative to take the young children to keep them away from the panic.

Then, before the ceremony get them dressed and talk them through the ceremony. Talk about the party afterwards and all the fun they're going to have. Don't keep them focused on their duties as flower girl or ring boy. The more you try to make them perfect the less likely there are to get through it.

Also, have an adult designated to handle problems down the aisle. It's not unusual to get confused, frustrated, or give up. So have someone ready to walk down the aisle and either carry them to the front or sit with them in the audience.

As children get older you can find a variety of tasks to keep them busy. They can man the guest register, hand out guides, usher, carry flowers, and a million other things. They'll enjoy this.

Teens are usually especially proud to usher parents and grandparents to their seats. Have some fun and make this formal. Despite complaints you'll see them strutting a bit as they escort loved ones to their seats.